10 hours before I am about to leave Johannesburg, South Africa for Atlanta before finally landing in Philadelphia. If there are no delays I will spend a few minutes under 24 hours traveling back home. Right now (as I write this in my notepad) my heart hurts so much. I do not want to leave South Africa, but I understand I must go back to my “life” in the US – back to school, and the “real world.”
I do consider the past 6 weeks my “life” – until I get back to my other one. There is something I will miss and these feelings – no one – except myself will ever understand.
I have gone to Durban, a few miles from sea level in which tiny houses painted with pastel colors overlooked mountains – and as someone pointed their hand out to the sky I followed it – their fingers showing me how beautiful this place is. The scenery, the golden sunset, those cute kids sitting on the mountaintops, and they never knew I shot that picture. I want them to look back at me and I want to show them that picture. Please, look back, I think. Maybe some other time.
I went to Cape Town and spent days with Viwe and Solomon walking the streets, even though some weren’t paved they knew which way to travel. Viwe showed me his house – his flat screen TV – he laughed. It was actually a cut out of a box that did have a flat screen TV inside. His bed is like my bed and the posters on his wall – music, art and a polaroid photo – the two of us – reminded that I affected him as much as he affected me. I could walk out for a second and see the exterior, cracked wooden shack, but he is no different then me. We drank beers, smoked cigarettes at the Waterfront Pub and tossing the ashes on the ground. He knew how excited I was to spend time in the township and he said, with Solomon by his side, “well, this is our home, but for right now it’s your home too.” I did not notice a sense of regret in the last statement – whether or not his accent, his skin color, or his country is different then mine. Are we really that different? Or is this what we read, see or are told?
It is here I came, not to travel to some game reserves or sit on the beach, but to experience culture – life – reality. Why everyone asks me why I am still not sure I can answer that question.
I have spent time in Nelspruit – BBQ’s with the local’s, every time they asked “make me a picture.” So I did. I shot it – on my digital camera and they looked at the LCD screen, satisfied, even though they probably will never see the picture again.
And of course I was in Joburg – where I “lived,” more than everyone else – where so many African myths were debunked time and time again.
Next year I will be back. I would like to start in Northern or Central Africa before coming back here, for now, unfortunately it is time to leave.
I regret too much on my trip. Not going to every single city and township and shooting every frame before my camera would have to be repaired. Of course I regret the impossible.
And then, right now, here, I am miles away from my “life,” or my other “life,” but it seems so hard to figure out that question “Why?” Why? I’ve given answers, but more will come in time. When I come back, or when I am somewhere else – thinking, dreaming.
These are my thoughts.
But for now,
Bye Africa.
My Africa.
you may not want to be back in this “life”, but always remember the question you asked, “are we really that different?” our cultures, societies, skin color, and countries may all be different, but we are all people. you have documented your africa, and i have documented my india. now we can share our stories, photos, and thoughts with others and truly show how people are really not that different around the world. kids in africa ask for a picture and a five second glance at your lcd screen, the same way the village kids in india wanted. you mentioned viwe’s flat screen tv, and i can tell you about a man that was fishing with only an old umbrella.
good luck with your semester,
saleem
I’d like to say that I don’t think you have separate lives, one that you experienced in Africa and the one you’ve built in the US. It’s all part of YOUR life, right down to each moment you snap a picture. While they might not seem to mesh well together, each experience is part of the life you are living and I know that through these experiences you have (and will continue) to grow. Gosh, I sound like a mother or something…
Just to have those experiences makes you a better person. Allowing yourself to be open to a culture that you’ve had (and been given) preconceived notions of, creates a better understanding of life and the world. Furthermore, being able to capture those experiences with your beautiful pictures allows you to show others what you saw and help them understand.
As to the “why Africa?” you know I’ve posed to myself the same question. Perhaps there will never be a straightforward answer; things aren’t always black and white. Some things are too difficult to explain in words, so just cherish each and every experience. It’s part of YOUR life now.
You have had and will continue to have experiences in which you grow as a human being.
I am glad you were so affected by visiting Africa.
Your view of life have changed because of this trip.
Remember that America can also be beautiful and thought provoking, too.
All of us share this planet and forget that we are all human beings and that is an amazing commonality.
Your dream is to change the world. The truth is the world changes all the time by the events of the people that live in it and by nature’s force on us.
Whether you have an impact on one person or a thousand then change will happen and that is a good and beautiful at the same time.